hello again :)

its been a while.

life has been crazy for the past 6 months.

too crazy maybe.

no regrets.

just when i asked for a mediocre life,god has to give me extra ordinary.

not really that i blame god for it.

still,no regrets.

full of emotions and knowledge.thats how i can summarize the past 6 months of my life.

knowledge.. *sigh*

i have yet to conclude that not everything you learn in life is good.nor every knowledge that you have is not deeply corrupted either.

and emotions..

hmm :)

i found love :)

and will probably lose it.
but like i said,

no regrets :)

:)

One Art
by Elizabeth Bishop

The art of losing isn't hard to master;
so many things seem filled with the intent
to be lost that their loss is no disaster.

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster
of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

Then practice losing farther, losing faster:
places, and names, and where it was you meant
to travel. None of these will bring disaster.

I lost my mother's watch. And look! my last, or
next-to-last, of three loved houses went.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster,
some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.
I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster.


--Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident
the art of losing's not too hard to master
though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster.

pretty words

Home and away
Life goes on the same, you bury the pain
And hold on to love
Heal the song, sing along
But what does it change?

Oh, this life is so confusing
Feels like I'm always losing

Come in of knowing everything
But don't say a word, till they teach you the way
Words are found too close to the edge
That we don't dare sing

This will turn into something else, something else
And when it does, I'll be somewhere else, somewhere else
Where else?

And you said I should be myself
Despite all the wrong, dragging you back
Forgive and then forgone and on and on and on

But this life is so confusing
Feels like I'm always losing

And this'll turn into something else, something else
But when it does, I'll be somewhere else, somewhere else
Where else?

these thingies we call MEN

i dont get it.

i dont get how the male brain works.ive been told that i have THAT kind of brain.

at first i thought that was a compliment.now i realize its more of an insult.

seriously.

why cant they all function normally and not so dramatically?

WHY?

why does everything have to be a goddamn drama?

AND QUIT CRYING GODDEMMIT

food of the day

I, Being Born a Woman and Distressed

I, being born a woman and distressed
By all the needs and notions of my kind,
Am urged by your propinquity to find
Your person fair, and feel a certain zest
To bear your body's weight upon my breast:
So subtly is the fume of life designed,
To clarify the pulse and cloud the mind,
And leave me once again undone, possessed.
Think not for this, however, the poor treason
Of my stout blood against my staggering brain,
I shall remember you with love, or season
My scorn wtih pity, -- let me make it plain:
I find this frenzy insufficient reason
For conversation when we meet again.

Edna St. Vincent Millay

have u ever had that feeling..

like just when ur gonna give a person a chance,

he/she fucked it up so bad that it just draws the line?

its an interesting feeling really.

especially when the person is a total psycho and u just never realized it.

it made u go speechless.

made every sweet memory left of him/her just vanished into thin air.

no longer that person u know.

just somebody.

and thats how its gonna be.for the rest of your life.

imprinted deep inside your brain and your heart.

some guy.some girl.
no more than that.

the interesting part is,
just how very few seconds ago

u smiled to yourself thinking there actually might be hope.

matttyyyyy

I have a friend named Matty.

Hes a good good friend of mine.

He looks like a model from abercrombie & fitch.but thats beside the point.

hes an awesome guy with great personality.

and hes having a really risky heart surgery.


let us all pray that he will make it through

spring break

its nothing but a week of tido and main game.

and study math 410 cause that shit is hard as hell.

i think i made a huge mistake.3 years ago.

i think im not gonna make the same mistake again.

and yeah.relationships suck.

its even worse when u had 3 years of it and just realized that u cant take it anymore.

that despite the feelings u have,its not worth it.

and as selfish as it was,it was the first right thing u ever did.

even though u have to break somebodys heart.

even though he/she eats ur conscience up.

even thought u miss him so bad.

trust me,its not worth it.

fucked.

i am broke.

no money even to ensure my place in the States.

no money to even pay my bills.

im pretty much fucked.

its over

finallyyyyyyyyy spring break is here

and im done with all of my exams

yay!

THE ULTIMATE DISCOVERY OF THE DAY

brown is the color of BULLSHIT.

FML

for those who are bored.

and done stalking ur exes.

and think ur life is fucked.

and wanna know other peoples fucked up lives.

http://www.fmylife.com/


and no its not like lemonparty.org.

and no im not rickrolling u.thats so last year.

awesome video for an awesome song

"'Cause I really always knew that my little crime
Would be cold that's why I got a heater for your thighs
And I know, I know it's not your time
But bye, bye."

LOL?

THE ULTIMATE DISCOVERY OF THE DAY

my grammar is getting suckier by the day.

i is bad.

very bad.

stupid gay song in stupid gay head

im addicted to this song.like addicted.
and its not even my kind of music.

and has this dumb annoying part that i hate.
yet im listening to it.

catchy tho.

food of the day

Sonnet : Love is not all

Love is not all: It is not meat nor drink
Nor slumber nor a roof against the rain,
Nor yet a floating spar to men that sink
and rise and sink and rise and sink again.
Love cannot fill the thickened lung with breath
Nor clean the blood, nor set the fractured bone;
Yet many a man is making friends with death
even as I speak, for lack of love alone.
It well may be that in a difficult hour,
pinned down by need and moaning for release
or nagged by want past resolution's power,
I might be driven to sell your love for peace,
Or trade the memory of this night for food.
It may well be. I do not think I would.

-Edna St Vincent Millay


I HEART MILLAY~~

shes my kind of woman.

lol,

...i need more coffee.brb.

HOLAAA!

so i decided to blog again.we will see how long this will last.haha.

i suck at consistency.

lalalaa